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Friday, August 10, 2012

Messaging Attitude

Annyeong people~ Since I am bored here I shall update this little blog.

As the title says, today I am gonna share on some messaging attitude that got on my nerves.

1. Short replies
I guess this is the common one. It gives people the kind of impression that you are not interested to talk anymore, or you don't really care. 

When to use short replies:
Hmm, actually sometimes it is a good way to end conversation. Like when you have an awkward moment or running out of topic, short replies actually just let the conversation fade~~~

Example:
A: Ok I needa go busy on my stuff. Later.
B: Ok. See ya.

When not to use short replies:
Well if I am talking to someone and that person replies me short messages, I would probably think he doesn't want to talk to me and shut up la. But at times, when I am talking about serious stuff, for example discussion, short replies really drive me nuts.

Example:
A: So are you free next week to go out?
B: hmm can also.
A: Do what?
(a long pause)
A: Movie?
B: can also.
A: What movie you wanna watch?
B: xxxxxxxxxxx

This is what typically gets on my nerve. If you wanna watch a movie, at least tell the person what you wanna watch, what you have watched/don't want to watch. You could just go "can also. How about xxxxxxx? I haven't watch that leh" or something like that.

I mean, this is not a Q&A session that you answer every question I post to you. I am doing a planning here. You could always give me some information that can help in planning, or at least actively participate by giving suggestions/ideas. By giving short replies or being so passive, you are giving me the feel that you don't really care about going out with me. 


2. Long pauses
Sometimes people will complain things like "why you take ages to reply texts?" Because sometimes I do take some time to reply, I need to apologize. 

Sometimes for slow replies, I will just assume that you didn't see the message. That's why when I INITIATED a text/convo, I don't expect immediate response, because there are so many reasons that one may not reply you.

Phone text:
- Charging in the room
- Silent mode
- Simply place in the house and didn't notice it
- Busy

MSN/facebook msg/skype or any online instant msgs
- Forgot to log out
- Busy working assignments on MS words hence didn't notice
- Playing games (full screen)
- Boiling drama porridge/Watching movie (full screen)

So why did I still put long pauses under "intolerable attitude"? Maybe some example first.

Tolerable example:
A: Yo (sent 8:30pm)
B: Yo (sent 9:00pm)
A: How have you been? (9:30pm)
B: Kind of busy. (10:00pm)
*and the convo ends here*

Well probably when A sent the msg, B was busy. so after waiting for a while, A went to find other stuff to do.  So when B replied, A was busy, and the loop goes on. Hence the abrupt end of conversation. I find this tolerable cause' timing tak ngam. (Although to make this better, they should explain why they reply so slow but well, since both sides reply slow neither can blame each other)

What I can't stand this is:

Intolerable example:
A: Yo (sent 8:30pm)
B: Yo (sent 9:00pm)
A: How have you been? (9:00pm)
B: Haha like that lo. (9:20pm)
A: Lol. What have you been doing? (9:20pm)
B: Usual stuff la, school, assignments, games, anime, haha. (9:45pm)

So in cases like this, you see that A replies immediately but B doesn't. If I were A, I would be damn pissed if B doesn't explain what takes him forever to reply. It's like, I am stoning in front of my computer to wait for your reply, or stop whatever I am doing in front of my computer when you msg. 

Like I said, I don't mind slow FIRST reply. Since you replied, I assume you are free now, or you didn't see my message just now but you see it now. Common sense tells you that I won't find you just for a "yo". You should be expecting more convo will going on. You can do your own thing, but please have the awareness to check your MSN/skype/Facebook every one minute or so when you posted a message (At least do that for like 5 minutes. If no reply from other side then you can continue with whatever you are doing la). 

If you have other commitments, for example assignment, then just say something like "sorry ar I doing assignment now, might reply a little slow". Because if you explain, the person you are having conversation with would have at least some expectation that "oh, he's gonna reply slow". He/she would have understand your situation, and can go on and do his own stuff instead of WAITING FOR YOUR REPLY. 

Even if you are playing games/watching drama and feel embarrassed to say so directly (It might send off an implication like gaming/drama is more important than talking to you), at least just say "Sorry a little busy with stuff" instead of just leaving it HANGING. 

Leaving the conversation hanging like that sends off the message that you are ignoring the person talking to you, and I am seriously pissed at that lo. Sometimes after a long wait I wanted to start doing other stuff that would require a lot of my attention (eg: blogging), then the other side suddenly replied, so I postponed my things and replied, hoping to start a chat/catch up session with old friends. After sending my msg, instead of blogging, I will be waiting there scrolling through facebook even though there is nothing to see, because I have the anticipation that you may reply anytime. And after 10 minutes when I finally gave up waiting, I went to do my own stuff, there you go again replying suddenly. And the loop goes on. Have you ever wonder how annoying it is?


3. Internet language
Well this depends on people la. Some people would bombard the conversation with short forms and cacat spelling. I am not very particular about it, but I do have friends who can't tolerate cacat spellings (skool, luv, hav, fren, shud, etc). The only thing I tak tahan is people spelling "come" as "cum". If you don't understand what is "cum", here is the link. Imagine you telling someone "I am cumming later"......*face palm*
* I am aware that "cum" can be "kopi-cum-tea" (as in "mix" or "with"), but I usually spell it as "cham" because the word "cum" seem vulgar to me. 


Hmm, I think I should stop here. haha. Cause' I can't think of others right now. And I have elaborate A LOT on attitudes that drive me crazy (ie: attitude 1 and 2). What I wanna say is, be considerate. You may have tonnes of reasons to text in the way you like/at your own pace, but think of the other side who is talking to you. Texting is very different from face-to-face communication after all.


Tata!

PS: This is my 100th post. =D

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