10 days din update jor...actually I oso deno what to write. hahahahahha XDD
I have been slacking. I got no motivation to work le.
I am only interested in playing nowadays.
Now only I know that "discipline" must be "practiced".
No matter how disciplined you were, once you slack for a long time, you will forget everything
What does it mean to be "responsible"
What does it mean to be "disciplined"
And you will gain a new friend called "procrastination".
I hate my laziness, yet I like the peace that laziness gives me. HOW!!?? It's like you hate your work but like the salary that the work gives you. I wonder if that makes sense
Anyway...I am too addicted to stressless life.
I don't want to stress myself over something...I am not committed to.
Peer pressure can have strong influence on you too.
AHHHH!!!!! Can thsi addiction be cured? I need some stress to motivate me.
I guess my self-discipline has crumbled.
I need people to nag me push me kick me set deadline for me so that I can start working now.
I am running a project that as if nobody is interested in running.
Nobody replies me
Nobody gives suggestions
Nobody even respond to suggestions.
I wonder do they even READ them.
But then again,
I didn't try to nag them
I didn't ask them do they even read it.
I find all these very tiring.
Or maybe I am just too lazy to deal with people AND project at the same time
I think it might be better if I do it one man show.
AIYOYOR!!!
I miss my old working partners. :/
I have Christine JinYee Duck Crow in YE
I have Lily Louise in Ed Board
I have Livia ZongYao XianDi in Prefects
and the most hyper batch of partners in UNGU.
As if, we have telepathy. We know what we want to do. And we agree to whatever we want to do.
Everyone suggests and comments
Everyone is doing their part
Everyone is reliable.
I think that's the thing I am lacking: Perfectionist working partners.
Sometimes I wonder if me being perfectionist is good.
Because I always tak tahan what others do.
I always take their job and improve them
Somehow I just tak tahan why can they hand in cincai work.
Or it doesn't matter to them, but only I am bothered with these details?
I dunno.
I think not only I fed up la,
all ppl in the team oso fed up.
A team of 20 ppl,
work here work there oso those few. A hand 5 fingers oso can count those kind.
Slowly all oso die passion dy la.
Eventhough I delegate everything
But in the end they come back, I have to do everything oso lo.
I think some ppl do just for the sake of doing.
Do to show some work
Do to write resume
In the end oso can see lo
Who giving effort who cincai do.
Haiyo so fan le.
King said he finished 4 events.
And my first one oso not done.
DIE MOU?
So fish and paiseh.
I oso feel like giving up the event lo.
But promise ppl jor u dun do it nto good for college name.
But then again, no one bothers.
I have no incentive to do it as well.
Lazy la!
HAIYO. so fan. @.@
hi kai boon! long time no see/talk. heh :B
ReplyDeleteanyway, i completely understand what you're going through. i take pride in calling myself a perfectionist when it comes to doing work but unfortunately not everyone appreciates my fastidiousness. it's really exasperating when it comes to group work, so depending on the importance of the project (high school is peppered with incredibly useless projects) i try to adjust my "perfectionism metre" haha. more lax with useless ones and obviously more disciplined with importance stuff (like ed board!).
so yeah, i can understand why some people have that kind of tak apa attitude, though i am at times surprised at some people's complete lack of regard for responsibility. :/ but that's their choice, to be irresponsible and to churn out crappy, sloppy work (ugh). my point is, it's actually VERY good to be a perfectionist (though being one myself, my opinion can be considered pretty bias heh) and by no means you should stop being one. our world needs more people who actually pay attention to details, even if just to make the existing perfectionists life less miserable.
sigh. the whole point of this comment (that reads more like a rant really) is to let you know that you're not alone! :) and to say hi!